Happy Valentine’s Day!!

Bright moonlight is dawning upon the night of 13th February, and shimmering in it are little droplets of rain – looking like pearls. The roads are lonely. Office goers have reached their homes; spending lovely time in company of their beloveds. Valentines’ couples who celebrated the day hiding behind the bushes, have now gone back to their special hotel rooms. College students who were out in the evening, roaming about the streets and “checking out” the couples, are now back in their dorm rooms, cursing their miserable lonely lives.

I decided to enjoy the weather and the occasion by climbing up the rooftop and looking about the beautiful night (I am writing this sitting on the rooftop. And yes, the rain has stopped.) The weather is way too pleasant, and the scenery too beautiful. The dazzling reflection of lampposts coming off the wet roads only adds to the beauty. Ah! It all seems like Paris to me.

Somewhere down the main road is a little shop that’s open. And people in it seem to be working hard. Very hard. There’s a complete team of dedicated people – three women, two children, one man, and one perhaps – someone in between, I can’t call on it’s gender from this far (no offence, please). They are all gearing up to make You feel good – that’s their business; they cash in on your happiness. It’s a small roadside flower shop. And tomorrow is their most profitable day.

Roses, Lillie, Tulips. Red, Violet, Yellow. All stacked up. Ready to be clubbed together in beautiful wrapping papers, sprayed upon by decorative frills, and stamped upon by love letters. Wow!

It seems all so pretty from up here.

“Well, it’s a marvelous night for a moondance
With the stars up above in your eyes
A fantabulous night to make romance
Neath the cover of October skies
And all the leaves on the trees are falling
To the sound of the breezes that blow
And I’m trying to please to the calling
Of your heart-strings that play soft and low
And all the nights magic seems to whisper and hush
And all the soft moonlight seems to shine in your blush”

A Very Happy Valentine’s Day to you and your beloved.  🙂

An Open Letter to the Prime Minister

PMJI-SAMJHO-JI-Second-Sample11

The Honorable Prime Minister,
152, South Block,
New Delhi – 110 011

Dearest Sir,

During your recent address to the nation, you acknowledged that “it is the responsibility of the government to defend the national interest, and protect the long term future of the people.” I appreciate this acknowledgement. I am also pleased to learn that the government plans to consolidate on the recently introduced FDI reforms. Congratulations!

But sir, apart from the economic crisis, the bigger problem that is infesting the citizens of this great country is “behavioral management”. Everyday I wake up to read a sad story on the Parliament – “Minister throws mike at the speaker”, “Lok Sabha adjourned after ministers tear down the bill”, “Lok Sabha suspended over mutual disagreement”, “Minister found guilty in religious riots”. It fills me with great sorrow to see the leaders of this nation – the successors of Mahatma Gandhi and Pt. Jawaharlal Nehru – the caretakers of world’s largest democracy, living in self-centered domain, imbibing greed and following unethical principles (convictions in CWG and 2G  scams); not all of them, but yes most of them!

I’m not judging the political class here, but trying to bring forth the mentality of our people by instancing the higher citizens of the country. If the lawful representatives of the constitution are going to behave in this manner, how do we expect the country to grow, and so is what we are witnessing – honor killings,  molestation, rapes, kidnappings, robberies and murders.

We must educate the minister, not intellectually, but morally. Moral values are a must if we want to overcome corruption.

Therefore, I suggest that we bring in a constitutional amendment that restricts any citizen from standing in elections if he is not adequately educated (at-least a high school graduate). Other than that, moral and ethical education sessions should be introduced for government employees.

Wishing you a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.

Sincerely,

Arjun Tuli

Promoting Candlelight Dinners in India: A Political Satire

[This political satire refers to the day of power grid failure in the country. The comments made in the article are fictitious.]

A candlelight dinner on a pleasant summer evening; romantic, isn’t it? Well, that’s exactly what the Government of India thought when it officially enforced such dinners throughout the northern half of the country on the night of 29th July.

Technically termed as electricity blackout, the candlelight dinners,according to the government officials were “improvised” to promote family bonding and cultural values.

“At a time when children spend hours in front of electronic screens and parents are busy with daily chores, it’s our duty to get the family together. And so we intentionally forced the blackout”, said an official.

On being asked why the blackout happened only in North India, the representative answered, “Our party doesn’t discriminate India on regional basis. The blackout area was randomly chosen. Our message to the rest of the citizens is not to worry, the blackouts will be held on a national scale, and on a frequent basis.”

Reacting to the government’s justification, the netizens in India trended hashtags#WeWantElectricity,#blackoutIndia, and #epicfailure on the micro blogging website.

“I hope we have a year-long blackout in the Parliament. Let there be harmony among the senators #blackoutIndia”, tweeted @AamAadmi

Rising to the occasion were parody accounts of Home Ministry and Electricity Department, the most popular being M0HIndia @MinistryOfHomeAffairs. The account had a million subscribers within a few hours, notable among which were the subscriptions of the opposition ministers.

Unable to digest the harsh criticism, the government launched an official complaint with twitter to block the parody accounts.
“We have requested the concerned authority to take down such users as they spread a wrong message in the public. As a precautionary measure, we are requesting our followers to trend #MOHIndiaRocksand #BlackoutForHarmony on twitter”, said a ruling party spokesperson.

The opposition on the other hand was seen bashing the government. “This move is a promotion of the candlelight dining facilities available at ministry owned hotels and restaurants. The government is bluffing the citizens. We need to have a CBI inquiry on this.”

Rubbishing the remarks of the opposition were the comments from ‘teesramorcha’ (the third wing). 
“Government has done the right thing. Such blackouts boost equality among the rich and the poor“, addressed their leader to the media.

Banking on high TRPs generated by the issue, media persons were tirelessly covering the event. ”Aamadmi faces the blackout burden. Electricity shortage rocks North India”, read the headline on a prime time news show.

Various other news channels showed exclusive footage of people trapped in the electricity net. ”Look here!! This man is forced to get a haircut under candlelight”, reported a correspondent.

In certain other parts of the country the situation was even worse. In New Delhi people got stranded in the Metro and were then forced to dine on the train floor by the officials. Special candles were lit for the occasion. As per the government, it was the best display of communal harmony.

At the end of the day, the power ministry released an official statement, “This blackout achieved a large scale success and we plan to organize more such events in near future.”

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